


When Things Get Complicated

by fallingforyou2ne1



Series: Crossroads [1]
Category: EXO (Band), 소녀시대 | Girls' Generation | SNSD
Genre: Alternate Universe - High School, F/M, M/M, a little bit of smut, a little tiny bit of angst?, it's not really good
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-10-03
Updated: 2018-10-03
Packaged: 2019-07-24 12:03:07
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 14
Words: 13,505
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16174688
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/fallingforyou2ne1/pseuds/fallingforyou2ne1
Summary: Kim Taeyeon is the queen bee and she's set her sights on Baekhyun. Since she's got a scary amount of power at school, he has to be her boyfriend, even if he'd rather be with someone else.





	1. "You're Baekhyun, right?"

**Author's Note:**

> I'M NOT A SMUT/PORN WRITER, SO PLEASE EXCUSE THE CRAP THAT I HAD TO THROW IN THERE. I HOPE YOU LIKE THE STORY ANYWAY!

When Kim Taeyeon came into the boys’ locker room after practice on Wednesday, I can’t say I wasn’t surprised. “Can I help you?” I asked, untying my shoes. If I wasn’t so tired, I might have been embarrassed by my sweatiness.

“Actually, I think you can.” she said, her voice as sweet as ever. When she said that, I finally looked up from my shoes. “You’re Baekhyun, right?” she asked, squatting down and finishing untying my shoes. I’d let Chanyeol tie them today and he always made sure there was no chance of them coming off. Now that she was this close to me, I was starting to feel pretty self-conscious concerning my sweatiness. Kim Taeyeon was at my feet wearing a little cheerleading uniform and I smelled terrible. What bothered me wasn’t her proximity (the image of her between my legs wasn’t doing much, which didn’t surprise me), but I was instead focused on the worry that she would spread rumors about me being unhygienic.

My brain finally remembered her question concerning my name, so I blurted, “Yeah, I’m Baekhyun.” As soon as the answer was out of my mouth, I could feel the blush spreading across my face.

“I hear that you’re single now.” she said, still not standing up. Her words felt like daggers stabbing into my heart, but I kept my composure and nodded. I didn’t know why that information was important to her, though. She’s Kim Taeyeon, the most feared, popular girl in school. She could have anyone she wanted, so why was she seated on the floor at my stinky feet? “I want to change that.”

I was immediately confused. “What do you mean?” This entire situation was so strange and my entire being was exhausted from football practice, so my brain was moving at a snail’s pace.

She just laughed, once and without much humor, before she stood back up and walked around behind me. She was out of my sight for only a moment before I could feel her hands coming down roughly on my shoulders. “I want you to be my boyfriend.”

“Why?” I turned my head to the side, trying to look at her.

“You’re cute.” she answered, not seeming to care that this was weird no matter who you were. “Do you not want to be my boyfriend?” she pouted, and I imagined her bottom lip sticking out slightly.

No, I don’t. “It’s not that... I’m just a bit surprised.” I mumbled, knowing I couldn’t refuse her.

Suddenly, her head was right next to mine. I could feel her breath on my neck as she whispered into my ear. “I asked you if you want to be my boyfriend.”

I knew she was expecting me to agree right away, or at least make it clear I was pleased with her request. She’s used to getting whatever and whoever she wants. It doesn’t matter that I’m not ready to date anyone yet; I’m just supposed to push my feelings away and become her toy. I didn’t want to conform to the rules in place, but I knew that I would come to regret it if I didn’t.

“Does it matter if I do or not?” I asked, not being able to stop the question from escaping.

“Of course it does.” she replied, the tone of her voice telling me that I’d be correct in assuming the real answer is exactly the opposite.

“Can I get back to you?” Since I’ve been a part of the so-called ‘popular’ crowd for my entire life, I knew the rules and I knew I couldn’t just agree right here, right now. Someone as important as Taeyeon has to be asked out in front of everyone. It’s more exciting that way, more acceptable in our world. Everyone gets to see how happy we are and the moment is rubbed in their faces.

“I sit in the courtyard during lunch.” she stated, letting her nails scrape lightly across the back of my neck as she walked out of the room. As soon as I was sure she’d gone, I slumped over and buried my face in my hands between my knees.   


	2. "Taeyeon, would you be my girlfriend?"

The next day during lunch, I made my way to the courtyard with Chanyeol and D.O on either side of me, a little nervous but mostly agitated. Taeyeon sat at a table right in the middle of the outside area, surrounded by the eight other cheerleaders she called her friends.

“Taeyeon.” I called once I was close enough to her.

She turned around, her long blonde hair (which she dyed religiously) swishing to the side. She batted her eyelashes innocently, feigning surprise perfectly. “Yes, Baekhyun?” she asked, looking from me to Chanyeol to D.O, a confused look on her face like she didn’t know what was going on.

In my chest, my heart was hammering against my ribcage. My nerves had skyrocketed since this morning when I asked my two closest friends to accompany me to this meeting. It’d gotten worse when I’d realized I had no idea where my football ring was, but Chanyeol assured me it’d be alright.

Before the silence stretched out for too long, I felt Chanyeol pressing something small and hard into my hand from behind. When I brought my hand out in front of me, my football ring sat in the palm of my hand. Taeyeon’s eyes got wider, her gaze resting on that tiny object that meant everything to her and the rest of her friends, but almost nothing to me. Around us, whispering erupted while her friends celebrated, either having known this would happen or playing along and pretending to be surprised.

I took a deep breath and when I exhaled, I said, as confidently (and deeply, since my voice isn’t very low) as possible, “Taeyeon, would you be my girlfriend?”

She threw her legs up and over the bench and stood up, her height betraying her power. “Of course I’ll be your girlfriend, Baekkie.” She brought her hand up and held out her slender fingers. Her eyes never left mine as I slid my ring on her perfect finger, feeling like I was signing over the rest of my life.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for reading!
> 
> my Twitter: @certkpopjunkie  
> my AFF: fallingforyou2ne1  
> my Wattpad: fallingforyou2ne1 (@lazygirl1320)


	3. "You left it after..."

“Where’d you get my ring?” I asked Chanyeol in the locker room.

“My house,” he answered, not bothering to look up from his bag. “Have you seen my socks?”

I tossed him a rolled up pair from my locker. “Just use a pair of mine.”

“Your feet are tiny.”

“When it comes to socks, size doesn’t matter. They’re adult socks. One-size fits all, basically.” He scoffed but didn’t argue anymore. “Why was it at your house?”

“Why was what at my house?” he asked, pretending not to know.

“My ring.” I knew why it was at his house, remembered the day perfectly well. I hadn’t remembered before, but he had. We both knew why my ring was there, that I’d left it in my rush to leave before things got too awkward. Today had been stressful enough and I wanted to tease him a little because his ears do that cute thing where – wait, no. Chanyeol’s not cute. What am I thinking?

“You know why it was at my house,” he said, turning away from me and sitting on the metal bench, putting my socks on his feet. And there it was, the tips of his ears tinged pink, the telltale sign he was embarrassed. I couldn’t stop my heart from beating a little faster, my own face flushing a slight shade of pink. “You left it after...”

I just nodded, satisfied, and went back to getting dressed.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for reading!
> 
> my Twitter: @certkpopjunkie  
> my AFF: fallingforyou2ne1  
> my Wattpad: fallingforyou2ne1 (@lazygirl1320)


	4. "Why'd she have to choose you?"

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> If what's written in this chapter isn't evidence enough, I'm not a very good smut writer. You'll see. Just bear with me, please.

"Why'd she have to choose you?" he asked, his hands digging into the skin of my hips, stalling his thrusts. I just groaned, trying to push back against him more. "Does she actually like you?”

"I don't know... I don't care." I mumbled, relieved when he began thrusting again. Every time, he managed to hit that spot deep inside of me, making me scream out. "Why do you care?"

"Since you're dating her now... do we have to stop this?" he asked, his fingers moving to squeeze my shoulders. There was an inflection of something sad in his voice, but I wasn't really paying any attention to that, caught up in the feeling of him inside of me.

"Maybe at some point." I choked out, feeling myself getting steadily closer to climaxing. He took in a breath like he was about to say something, but I interrupted him, "Chanyeol, stop worrying about her and just fuck me." At that, he completely pulled out and flipped me over, obviously a bit agitated that I'd interrupted him, immediately thrusting back into me at a faster pace than before. "Ah!" I knew at this rate, practice would be hell tomorrow, but I couldn't bring myself to care.

Now that he was done talking, the only sounds in the room were our moans and skin slapping against skin. As my orgasm continued to approach, my stomach twisting into a tighter and tighter knot, I realized that neither Chanyeol nor I have even touched me. I groaned, hating the feeling that he didn't even have to touch me and loving it at the same time.

Pretty soon, he's releasing inside of me, since we stopped using condoms a long time ago. He continuously moans encouragements into my ear, nipping at my earlobe and the skin of my neck below. Within a few seconds of his high, I'm coming between us, the white liquid warm on my stomach, smearing onto his dark sheets as well.

He pulls out, which causes me to gasp, which is embarrassing, and walks into his bathroom for a towel, coming back a minute later. "Oh, Baekhyunnie, you're always so messy." he said, gently wiping at my stomach.

"Shut up." I mumbled, yawning and pulling at the covers around me.

After he put the towel away, he came and laid down beside me, finally covering both of us up. We laid on opposite sides of the bed, facing away from each other, neither of us really wanting to cross whatever line there was left. Since he and I meet up like this every Monday, I'm not sure there's much of a line, but it's nice to pretend there is. From the beginning, it was made clear that whatever Chanyeol and I were doing was purely physical, no emotions involved.

At least, that's how it started out.

The only boundary we have left is the rule I put in place that kept him from kissing me. Originally, I thought it up because I don’t like to kiss people I don’t actually like; it’s too personal and emotional to me. Now, the rule is more of a safeguard, since I don’t know what I’d do if he kissed me. I might blurt out something stupid like ‘I love you’ and that would be catastrophic because he’s so obviously not into me in that way.

Before we started this, Chanyeol was my best friend. He still is, but it’s a bit different now, obviously. After my relationship with... my last girlfriend failed, he was there for me, like a best friend should be. I was sad, verging on depressed because being with her, a girl, hadn’t felt as great as I felt with Chanyeol, another guy. So he distracted me from the thoughts of her, and his distractions became more sexual with time, but he was successful in getting my mind off of her. In the long run, though, I think it only made things worse for me since I’ve actually started to feel less than just platonically toward him.

Both of us swear left and right that we don’t really like each other like that. It’s getting harder for me to say that truthfully, but he seems fine, so I keep it in.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for reading!
> 
> my Twitter: @certkpopjunkie  
> my AFF: fallingforyou2ne1  
> my Wattpad: fallingforyou2ne1 (@lazygirl1320)


	5. "I think you should sit with me at lunch."

“I think you should sit with me at lunch,” Taeyeon suggested once she’d gotten close enough to my locker, though this wasn’t actually a suggestion. It was more like an order. Chanyeol sighed beside me, but not loud enough for her to hear.

“But I sit with my friends,” I argued lamely, looking to Chanyeol for help. He just shrugged, the tips of his ears turning pink. Apart from being embarrassed, this happened when he was put on the spot or when he lied.

“Not anymore,” she replied, her voice too sweet. “Since we’re dating now, we need to sit together. People need to see us together.”

“Why can’t you sit at my table?” I asked, reluctant to agree to this. What football player sat with the cheerleaders?

Her face scrunched up in disgust. “Ew, no. I’m not sitting with your football friends. You’re coming to sit at my table, end of story. See you at lunch.” She leaned forward and stood on her toes to kiss my cheek. I wanted to recoil, but she’d have killed me.

As soon as she was gone, Chanyeol started laughing while I tried to wipe the sticky lip gloss she must’ve just applied from my cheek. I just punched his shoulder to try and shut him up, but it didn’t seem to faze him.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for reading!
> 
> my Twitter: @certkpopjunkie  
> my AFF: fallingforyou2ne1  
> my Wattpad: fallingforyou2ne1 (@lazygirl1320)


	6. "Do I have to sit here everyday?"

At lunch, the cheerleaders watched me like vultures and picked at any possible weak spots I had. I felt like I was being interviewed and closely monitored for any signs of weakness. After a while, I guess I’d passed and they started talking to Yoona about someone, though I hadn’t picked up on who. I leaned over to Taeyeon while the attention was off of me and whispered, “Do I have to sit here every day?”

She turned to look at me, her face beautiful and scary at the same time. “Yes, Baekhyun. But don’t worry; before long you’ll have some more interesting company.”

I had no idea what she meant until, one by one, my friends started sitting at my new table. It took a little over a week for the first person to join me, which was Suho. I knew he was dating Yuri, had seen him basically confess to her at the game last Friday, but I thought maybe he was there just to keep me company.

We both had the same class before lunch and when we reach the cafeteria, he usually breaks away and goes to our table. When he didn’t, I was confused. “Why are you coming over here?”

“Yuri said that Taeyeon wants me to sit with them,” he answered, his exterior completely composed. I could tell he was as uncomfortable as I had been. “Something about how we need to show everyone else how happy we are.”

It made sense; Taeyeon’s entire life was built around looking perfect to the outsiders, and that translated over to her friends as well.

We only broke away from each other when I was forced to sit next to Taeyeon and he had to go to the end and sit with Yuri.

 

The next guy to join us was Chen, but he hadn’t listened at first. Maybe Tiffany hadn’t told him, but maybe he was trying to rebel a little. No matter the reason, Tiffany still dragged him over to our table. He whined the entire way across the cafeteria, but he got quiet as soon as he sat down, probably because he didn’t want to make Taeyeon angry. I hadn’t even known Chen and Tiffany were dating (and it was about time because they’d been hooking up for a while before this), which just goes to show how distant I’ve become from my friends, all because of Taeyeon and her stupid obsession with perfection.

 

Eventually, our table was split into two, since there are beginning to be too many people to fit at one table. Despite there only being only eight of the girls left sitting at the table (and I had no guess as to why Jessica had left the table), Sunny made her own addition to the table and Sehun’s broad shoulders pushed us over the edge.

“Sunny’s dating Sehun?” I asked Taeyeon, confused.

“No. She’s just being nice.”

 

Next came D.O with Yoona. There were now five of us sitting with the girls, which meant there were only four guys left at our old table. Yet, when I looked over, it was completely empty. “Where is everyone?” I asked him, grateful Yoona sat across from Taeyeon, therefore D.O did as well.

“Well, Lay is sitting over there in the corner with Jessica Jung,” he said, nodding his head in the general direction of Lay’s new table. I looked over to find that he was laughing with her. I knew he’d made the decision that Taeyeon wouldn’t approve of since she hated Jessica.

“Are they together?” I asked, still watching them. Out of the entire football team, Lay has always been the sincerest, so I trust he’s not just over there looking to get into her pants like most guys are when it comes to Jessica. Ever since a few weeks ago, Jessica’s been on the outs with the entire school, which means Taeyeon hates her. I don’t know the exact details of what happened, no one does, but I heard the same rumors everyone else did; that Jessica was a slut and Taeyeon didn’t want to associate with her anymore.

“I think so. You know, I don’t get to talk to everyone else anymore,” he replied, taking an angry sip of his drink. “I’m starting to wonder if she’s worth it.”

I nodded, understanding him completely, but knowing he could leave at any time. Yoona may be popular, but she isn’t as mean-hearted as Taeyeon and D.O wouldn’t let that stand in his way in the first place. He must actually like her, just like all the other guys at this table. They’re all happy in their relationships, despite being forced away from our table, while I’m sitting here miserable.

“Where’s everyone else?”

“Xiumin’s in the library, studying with some girl... the one ahead of him for valedictorian.”

I didn’t want to make it obvious that I was wondering about Chanyeol since I hadn’t seen him for so long. “What about Kai?”

“Honestly, I don’t know where Kai goes during lunch, but he isn’t in the cafeteria and he won’t tell me, so I just gave up trying to pull it out of him.” D.O hasn’t ever been much of a conversationalist, but he talks to Kai more than anyone else. I’m sure that not being able to talk to him as much as affecting D.O more than he’d like to admit.

I nodded slowly, trying to think of something else to say to ease Chanyeol into the conversation. I’m not sure why I was being so careful about it since no one else, not even D.O, knew about us. I just didn’t want to scare him off, since it’s Friday and this is the most contact I’ve had with anyone other than Taeyeon since Monday. Fortunately, it’s been raining ever since Wednesday and the football game tonight was canceled. I’m hoping she doesn’t ask me to do anything because I’ve got plans later.

He waved off my next question before I could even begin, groaning because he hated talking so much. “Baekhyun, I’m done talking for today.” Then, he laid his head down on Yoona’s shoulder and she just cooed at him, probably trying to rub his affection in Taeyeon’s face. He must think I already know about whatever Chanyeol's doing.

I looked over at our old table, feeling my heart clenching at the emptiness.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for reading!
> 
> my Twitter: @certkpopjunkie  
> my AFF: fallingforyou2ne1  
> my Wattpad: fallingforyou2ne1 (@lazygirl1320)


	7. "So we've reached that point."

“Where do you sit at lunch?” I asked as soon as the door had closed behind us.

“I sit with Seohyun behind the shed at the back of the school.” I hadn’t even noticed Seohyun’s absence from the table at lunch.

We were both out of breath after running from our last class, which we share, to the boys’ locker room. Since the game was canceled due to the rain, no one would be in here and we couldn’t do it at one of our houses. For once, my parents are home, taking a break from their continuous business trips to rest. His parents are usually home, anyway, and we almost never go to his house.

Even though we’re both pretty confident no one will come into the locker room, there’s no way to be sure. Instead of doing this out in the open, we both get into the nearest shower, pulling the curtain over the door and turning the water on full blast to drown out the noises we’re making.

The first thing he does is press me against the cold tiles to rid me of my clothes, pinning my arms to the wall by my wrists. The water is pointing right at us and our clothes are soaked, mine on the floor and his still on his body.

“Take your fucking clothes off,” I whine, aggravated that he always does shit like this. It’s definitely some sort of power thing, something he does to embarrass me. He’s usually much nicer, acts more innocent around me, but when we’re in situations like this, he can get... would the word be kinky?

His teasing works quickly and I start pulling at his shirt until he complies, raising his arms above his head. His pants come off next, along with his underwear, and we’re finally both naked.

He’s shoving me down and I’m about to give in when we hear the door to the locker room closing and Taeyeon’s calling out my name.

“What does she want?” Chanyeol asks, not as worried about being caught as he is annoyed that he’s not getting a blowjob.

“I don’t know,” I whisper, watching the curtain getting darker as Taeyeon walks closer.

“Baekhyun, are you in here?” she called, her voice alarmingly close. “Who’s in the shower?”

She’s about to pull the curtain aside, which would have been bold because I’m sure that invading someone else’s privacy, being in a place you’re not supposed to be in, isn’t even something Kim Taeyeon can do, but Chanyeol shifts over, pulling the curtain aside, but only enough to peek out at her. “Just me.” For a split second, all I can think about is how cute he sounded just then, almost innocent like we weren’t just about to have sex in a shower at school.

“Oh, Chanyeol, I’m sorry! I thought Baekhyun might be in here.”

I listen to their exchange, thinking about how close she is to finding out. Chanyeol honestly isn’t the best liar because of that obvious tell, but maybe she won’t notice his ears are getting red and if she does, she couldn’t possibly know that he’s lying just by seeing that.

“He went home.”

“I guess he did... but why are you showering here? You don’t have practice today and the game’s canceled.” And there she goes, being nosy and acting like everyone else’s business is automatically her business.

“I just... felt dirty...?” I looked up from admiring his backside to see that his ears are, in fact, red. I know he’s probably panicking, but there’s nothing I can do to help him.

“Okay.” She sounded content with the answer. “Sorry to bother you.”

“It’s fine.”

A sigh of relief escaped my lips when I heard her footsteps getting farther away, but they suddenly stopped and my stomach dropped, afraid I’d been too loud and she’d recognized my voice. “Hey, Chanyeol?”

“Hmm?”

“Were you singing or something? I thought I heard voices.” I could have fainted at her words.

Chanyeol struggled to find the words to reply for a second. “You heard me?”

“You weren’t loud enough that I could make out the words, but I could hear your voice. What were you singing?” Honestly, she hadn’t heard Chanyeol’s voice, she’d heard mine, and our voices are extremely different in tone. She had to have known that. Kim Taeyeon is nothing if not perceptive. Hopefully, she really did think she’d heard Chanyeol, and she wasn’t just suspicious.

“Uh, just something I made up.” he lied, his ears burning. I wanted to laugh, to touch his ears, tease him, but that would give me away.

She didn’t say anything else, so the conversation was over. Once we heard the locker room door close behind her, Chanyeol looked back at me.

“Why is she looking for you?” he asked lowly, probably still afraid she could hear. I just shook my head, not wanting to talk. “Do you think she really likes you? Like she wanted to spend time with you?”

I shrugged. “I doubt it, but I feel bad all the same. I hate lying and sneaking around, Chanyeol.”

“So we’ve reached that point. You’re done.” You’re done. He said it like I wanted it to be over.

I didn’t say anything, didn’t refute what he’d said, because ending it was what was best. Instead, I bent over and picked up my wet clothes and he did the same. He turned the shower off and we got out, putting on some extra dry clothes from our lockers, not speaking. I just wished he would tell me we didn’t have to stop, that we didn’t have to sneak around and lie anymore. I wanted him to say he wanted to keep seeing each other, that he wants me to break up with Taeyeon because he actually likes me and he doesn’t care about what anyone else says. But he doesn’t.

“Do you have feelings for her?” he blurted as we were walking out of the locker room. The halls were empty at this time of day, but his voice was still quiet.

“She’s my girlfriend,” I answered, trying to avoid actually giving an answer, not wanting to tell the truth but not wanting to lie.

I had no reason to like Taeyeon, but I felt the need to give her a chance. If I continue seeing Chanyeol behind her back, there was no way I’d ever want to get to know her, no way we could ever actually connect. Though I doubt I’ll ever connect with anyone as I do with Chanyeol.

“That’s not what I asked,” he mumbled, not wanting to receive an answer as much as I didn’t want to give one. “I can’t say I won’t miss you,” he whispered, stopping at the end of the dark hallway.

I didn’t answer, wanting to say I’d miss him, too, wanting to say everything that had been on my mind since we’d started this, but he hadn’t given me enough to know he felt the same. “Chanyeol...”

He brought both of his hands down on my shoulders gently, only pressing down a little, a stark contrast from when Taeyeon did the same thing the day she strutted into the locker room. His big brown eyes searched my own and I felt my heart speed up, a blush rising in my cheeks. Again, I looked at his ears and the redness was unmistakable, which would mean he was feeling pressured, nervous. Maybe I’d been wrong to assume our relationship was simply platonic in his mind. Even so, it’s not like he was telling me not to leave.

“Baekhyun, I hope—” His voice cracked before he could finish the sentence, making the flush in his ears spread to his cheeks, and it was so adorable. Thinking about what he was saying, I couldn’t help but compare this to a breakup. But why did it feel this way? We weren’t even really together, didn’t even have feelings for each other, supposedly.

Then, he completely shattered whatever facade I’d managed to maintain by bringing his lips down to meet mine. The heat in my face spread down my neck as my eyes fluttered closed, squeezing out a single tear. This kiss wasn’t hungry or messy, it was simply sweet. That’s what made it so much more painful, so much harder to bear. And it felt so right. It made my heart beat twice as fast, it made my legs weak, it made me feel so much tightness in my chest and I’m sure that’s because there was so much love swelling up inside of me.

It was over just as quickly as it started. He broke away from me first, not hesitating to walk out into the downpour and to his car. I just stood there and watched him go, my brain a whirlwind of emotions and thoughts. The one thing I kept focusing on during the turmoil was that feeling of warmth he’d brought me for just a minute.

He kissed me. Chanyeol kissed me.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for reading!
> 
> my Twitter: @certkpopjunkie  
> my AFF: fallingforyou2ne1  
> my Wattpad: fallingforyou2ne1 (@lazygirl1320)


	8. Getting to Know Taeyeon

For the next few weeks, I tried my best to get to know Taeyeon, figure out why she is the way she is. She didn’t want to trust me at first, believing I just wanted to annoy her, make her break up with me. Eventually, though, she started to get more comfortable with me.

I know that her parents are away a lot, like mine, but they just like to travel. She used to go with them, but a mixture of school responsibilities and distance from them made her stop.

I know that she’s closest to Tiffany and has been since elementary school.

I know that she paid someone to seduce Jessica and video it to make everyone shun her because she felt threatened by Jessica’s beauty and popularity. She won’t tell me who she paid, but she told me he’s on the football team and I know him.

I know that her favorite movie is Roman Holiday because it’s Audrey Hepburn, but it isn’t Breakfast At Tiffany’s because that’s obviously Tiffany’s favorite and their favorites can’t be the same.

I know that she sometimes says certain words with more emphasis at least once during a sentence.

I know that she’s still scared of the dark and she sleeps with a castle-shaped nightlight.

I know that she sleepwalks and sometimes wakes up sitting on her porch, even if it’s freezing outside.

I know that she wears contact lenses because she’s short-sighted, but she would never wear colored contacts because that’s so trashy.

I know that she loves music and that she likes to write lyrics. She says she’s written a song about me, but she won’t let me see it or hear it.

I know that she’s insecure about her body because she thinks she’s too skinny. Even though she’s got boobs and nice hips, I just can’t bring myself to get turned on with her unless I’m thinking about Chanyeol, picturing him underneath me instead of her.

While I don’t find myself being attracted to her physically, I do care about her because I can understand how she feels and why she’s so controlling of every aspect of her life. She couldn’t control her parents, how they left her behind, not caring if she’d really wanted them to. A lot of the time, I felt the same way, but I’d never been close to my parents like she’d been. I felt sympathetic toward her and the last thing I wanted to do was hurt her, so I kept going, I kept my feelings for Chanyeol tucked away in the furthest corner of my mind.

She isn’t nearly as bad as everyone thinks she is. While I still miss Chanyeol, in more than one way, I know that staying with Taeyeon won’t be very hard to do.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for reading!
> 
> my Twitter: @certkpopjunkie  
> my AFF: fallingforyou2ne1  
> my Wattpad: fallingforyou2ne1 (@lazygirl1320)


	9. "Why did you kiss me that day?"

“Baekhyun!”

“Chanyeol?”

He ran up to me, wrapping his arms around my torso and nuzzling his face into my neck. My legs immediately went weak, buckling at the knees, but he held me up easily.

“Chanyeol, what do you want?” I asked, not trying to sound aggravated, but I was actually feeling that way on the inside. I’ve been trying so hard for the past few weeks to get to know Taeyeon, to try to like her, and seeing him, touching him, is ruining all of that. All of these weeks of avoiding him to save myself seem to have meant nothing now that he was hugging me now.

“It’s just been so long since we’ve been alone together,” he mumbled, still hugging me tightly. “Remember, we were friends before...”

I finally hugged him back, telling myself that this was okay; we had been friends since kindergarten and it’s not like he was trying to start something at the moment. It felt nice and my heart fluttered. If I ignored everything else, I actually felt kind of happy.

After a few moments went by in silence, I pulled away, looking up at him, the aggravation I’d had before resurfacing. “Why did you kiss me that day?” I kept my voice low, knowing the halls seemed empty, but looks can be deceiving. Around us, the world was quiet, making our voices seem louder than they really were.

“Because I wanted to,” he said, tilting his head to the side and looking into my eyes.

“Well, you shouldn’t have.” I scolded, sticking my bottom lip out slightly in a pout.

“Why not?” There was a hint of something in his voice... hope, maybe?

“You know why.”

“Was it everything you hoped it wouldn’t be?”

I blushed, wishing he would stop looking at me like that. His eyes bored into my own, his teeth sinking into his cushiony, soft bottom lip, and I wanted to kiss it so bad. He wore a simple black t-shirt and jeans, an outfit that shouldn’t have looked as good as it did. My reaction was obviously the only answer he needed.

“How have you been getting along with Taeyeon?”

“Fine. She’s not as bad as you think.” I kept my tone defiant, knowing exactly what he wanted me to say. I’m not sure why I didn’t say it. Wouldn’t that get me what I really want?

“I doubt that.” I hadn’t noticed he’d been getting closer to me, or that I’d been taking steps back until my back hit the lockers behind me, my face heating up at the noise and his proximity. He brought his arms up so that his hands were pressed against the lockers on either side of my head. “Do you really want me to let you go?”

Any sane thoughts had long since fled my head, so I told him the truth. “No.”

My answer surprised both of us. I saw a flicker of a smile cross over his lips, the lips that I really wanted to be pressed against mine. My gaze flickered up to his eyes, seeing he was focusing on my mouth.

“Can I kiss you?”

“Why are you asking this time?”

“Because I didn’t last time and I felt bad about it.” He finally made eye contact with me.

I brought my hands up to tangle in his hair, which was a dark red color and had been ever since our last game. I tugged on a few curls to bring his face closer to mine. When I stopped pulling, he didn’t stop leaning in. Within a few seconds, he full-on kissed me, sending a fresh blush over my cheeks.

He broke away too soon, his face just centimeters from mine while he looked down at me. He smiled that cute smile that makes his eyes crinkle. “Baekhyunnie, you’re so pretty when you blush.” One of his thumbs came to caress the heated skin of my face before he kissed both of my cheeks.

“Chanyeol, please just kiss me.” I pleaded, trying to bring our lips back together by pulling on his hair again. Instead, he changed direction and placed open-mouthed kisses on my jawline.

“But, Baek, you know what that would mean.” He didn’t stop kissing my neck.

“I know and— Taeyeon?”

Both of us were so enthralled with the other that we didn’t notice another presence in the hall. I saw her first, after Chanyeol turned my face in order to get more access to my neck. At first, I couldn’t comprehend what was happening; my brain was clouded over with thoughts of Chanyeol, thinking about how good this felt and how his hands were traveling further and further down my body. When my eyes finally connected with my brain, my hands were pressing against Chanyeol’s chest, pushing him backward and making him stumble a bit, and my voice cracked as I said her name.

She just stood there, her bag hanging from one of her shoulders. “What the fuck?” she breathed, the word sounding strange coming from her. Kim Taeyeon never cussed.

Chanyeol just stood frozen in place, his ears red and his facial expression reflecting my emotions. He just shook his head rapidly, disbelieving, his lips slightly parted as if he wanted to say something. I’m sure he would have if she hadn’t cut him off because he wasn’t ready for this to be known, wasn’t ready to admit it to everyone. That was everything I needed to know in the minutes to come.

“What is this?” she asked, dropping her bag. It landed with a loud thud that resounded throughout the otherwise empty hallway. “Are you two...” Her unfinished question left endless possibilities.

I just looked down at my shoes, not wanting to meet her gaze. I could’ve sworn I heard Chanyeol muttering something under his breath, still shaking his head. His eyes were wide and he looked more scared than I’d ever seen him. Other than that, none of us spoke, probably because we couldn’t think of anything to say. Nothing could make this better.

After what felt like an hour of just standing there holding my breath, Taeyeon picked up her bag and sped past Chanyeol and me, pushing her way out the double doors at the end of the hall.

I looked up at him and he was already looking at me, a sort of pleading look in his eyes. I just shook my head, not knowing what he wanted me to do or say before I followed Taeyeon outside.

I didn’t see her anywhere, but I knew she couldn’t have gone far in the thirty seconds she’d had ahead of me. I looked over the parking lot and saw that her car wasn’t occupied, still parked in her spot. I’m sure I wasn’t meant to, but I heard a sniffle from behind me and I turned to find her almost hidden behind part of the building. She was huddled up in the corner with her knees pulled up against her chest, her face peeking out at me. When our eyes met, a fresh round of tears began and she buried her face behind her hands to hide. Her perfect makeup was ruined, her mask broken. I hated knowing that I was the cause; I had gotten her to believe that I was sincere in trying to get to know her and now she thought I’d actually been lying.

“Taeyeon, I’m so sorry,” I said lamely, sinking down to my knees in front of her.

She just glared at me. “No, you’re not.”

I reached for her, trying to hold her hands, but she jerked away from me, the look in her eyes one of betrayal and heartbreak, which just made me feel even worse. “It wasn’t supposed to happen.”

“What was supposed to happen?” she asked, though I don’t think she wanted an actual answer.

“Ever since that day in the locker room, Chanyeol and I haven’t spoken—”

“What day in the locker room?” Her mouth hung open, confused. I spluttered, trying to find something to say to cover up what I’d said before, but she quickly pieced it together. “The day I walked in and Chanyeol was in the shower?” I slowly nodded my eyes, hoping that honesty would be best in this situation, that she’d appreciate it more than if I’d just lied. Her eyes widened in realization. “You were in there with him?”

Once again, I nodded. “We didn’t get very far if that makes you feel any better.” To be honest, I’m not really sure why I said that because her face got red. I couldn’t tell if it was because she was embarrassed or angry.

“It doesn’t,” she said through her teeth. I bit my lip and nodded again, feeling like a bobble-head. “Are you two together?”

“No, we never really were.”

“What does that mean? You two were just making out.”

I blushed, trying to hide it as best I could. “That’s the only the second time he’s ever kissed me...” If I could have punched myself, I would’ve. “I mean, there weren’t any emotions involved.”

“Why?”

I guessed she was referring to our relationship as a whole, so I said, “I needed a distraction after my last relationship ended.” I looked up at her and the look on her face told me to elaborate. “So Chanyeol decided it was a brilliant idea to distract me with... sex.” I trudged on through the embarrassment and awkwardness. “A few weeks ago, we stopped seeing each other altogether. What happened today isn’t a regular thing.”

“So you’re saying...?” Her hand twirled around a little, her perfect fingernails looking sharper than usual.

I gulped and continued. “I didn’t want to keep being dishonest with you, so I’ve been avoiding him.” Neither one of us said anything for a few minutes. Eventually, I couldn’t wait anymore. “But I don’t want you to break-up with me.”

She looked at me, her eyes glistening. Suddenly, her face didn’t look sad anymore, just stern. “Baekhyun, that was never an option. We can’t break up. People would see that my relationship was a failure and that’s embarrassing. And if we broke up, they would have to know the reason, which means I would have to tell everyone that you’re gay.”

My eyes widened and the skin of my face got even redder than it had been. I thought I’d explode from embarrassment. “I’m not gay.”

She rolled her eyes. “I saw you and you seemed really into it. Not to mention...” She gestured with a nod to her head to the crotch of my sweatpants. I quickly pressed my hands down over the obvious tent and blushed. “Also, straight guys don’t go behind their girlfriends’ backs to get fucked by other guys. Plus, you blush too much to be straight.”

Her words just made me even redder and I could’ve sworn I was the color of a tomato. “I’m not gay,” I repeated. And she’d just assumed I was the getting fucked.

She shook her head, possibly giving up. “If you say so.” She shrugged, acting nonchalant like the ice queen she wants people to believe she is. That was the worst because I’d gotten past that facade, I’d gained her trust, and now I’d gone and destroyed everything. Then, she fixed me with a cold glare. “We’re not breaking up, but no more sneaking around behind my back. Knowing I’m being cheated on is worse than breaking up. If you ever do that again, I’ll tell everyone exactly why we broke up. I’m sure you don’t want that.”

I nodded quickly, not moving to stand even when she got up.

“I’m not done being angry with you, though,” she said, looking down at me with her hands on her hips. “You’re coming over to my house Friday night. My parents won’t be home and I’ve got some ideas about what I can do to you to make me feel better.”

Shit.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for reading!
> 
> my Twitter: @certkpopjunkie  
> my AFF: fallingforyou2ne1  
> my Wattpad: fallingforyou2ne1 (@lazygirl1320)


	10. "I guess that just depends on how long it takes to break you."

After the game Friday, I went home with Taeyeon. Her parents were, unsurprisingly, out of town for the entire weekend, so we had the house to ourselves.

Since she found out about Chanyeol and I a few days ago, Taeyeon and I have been tense around each other. She feels betrayed while I feel like I’m walking on broken glass around her, waiting for her to say that it’s over and she’s going to tell everyone about what happened between Chanyeol and me.

While I stood right next to the front door, thinking, she was leaning on the doorframe to her living room. She was still dressed in her cheerleading uniform, still wearing her hair up in that perfect ponytail. Suddenly, the uniform looked baggy, her ponytail droopy, and her face not as composed as it had been before.

She must have been thinking along the same lines. “To be honest, that uniform just looks bulky on you,” she said, turning around with a swish of her hair and disappearing into the living room. I just sighed and followed her, getting nervous thinking about what was to come.

She patted the space beside her on the couch, so that’s where I sat.

“I have a lot of questions, but I’m not going to voice them, mostly because I don’t think I’ll ever understand,” she informed me, taking one of my hands in hers and threading our fingers together.

Well, I had questions that I was definitely going to get answers to, one way or another. “What are you going to do to me tonight?”

She smirked. “Nothing new, I’m sure.

“How long are you going to be mad at me?”

“I don’t know... I guess it just depends on how long it takes to break you.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for reading!
> 
> my Twitter: @certkpopjunkie  
> my AFF: fallingforyou2ne1  
> my Wattpad: fallingforyou2ne1 (@lazygirl1320)


	11. "I really didn't want to know any of that."

I had to talk to someone about Taeyeon and the only person I could think of was D.O since I didn’t want to see Chanyeol, much less tell him about what was going on between Taeyeon and me.

“You know, Baekhyun, I didn’t even know we were that close of friends,” he whined, lying back on his bed while I sat on the carpet of his room. “I really didn’t want to know any of that.”

I’m not sure how red my face is, but I can feel the heat and pressure behind my skin. I must look like a balloon. “You’re all I’ve got now, D.O.”

“Obviously.” he scoffed, sitting back up and glaring at me. “You turned your old best friend into your fuck buddy.” My eyes widened, breaking contact with his stare and looking at the floor instead. “Now your girlfriend knows and she’s more than a little pissed that you cheated and she’s having her way with you.”

I just nodded along with his words, hating to admit it.

“The worst part is that you’re probably liking it.” he continued. “Why couldn’t you have gotten advice from Chen? I’m sure he’d be better at talking about this.” The implications in his statement were clear.

“I doubt he and Tiffany—”

“I don’t. The way he always walks on Mondays makes him look like he’s got a rod up his ass.” He laughed, though there was no joy in it. “I bet that by saying that, I’m closer to the truth than we’d think.”

I shook my head. “Gross.”

“You’re one to talk. Kim Taeyeon is fucking you, not the other way around.”

“D.O, I came to you because I want advice. Do you want me to go somewhere else?”

The smile that had settled on his lips immediately disappeared and he stopped all of his prior movements. “That would be great. I’m out of my comfort zone.”

I groaned and stood up, realizing that sitting on the floor wasn’t the best idea after what happened last night.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for reading!
> 
> my Twitter: @certkpopjunkie  
> my AFF: fallingforyou2ne1  
> my Wattpad: fallingforyou2ne1 (@lazygirl1320)


	12. Taeyeon's Punishments

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I don't think I can express this well enough in my own words. What Taeyeon does to Baekhyun isn't kinky, it's abusive, mentally and physically. It really is a serious issue and I don't think this really explains it in the way I want it to. So, yeah, some dub-con and sexual abuse. If you have any suggestions, please let me know and if you don't want to read, then you can skip. It isn't very graphic, though, because again, I just can't write it well enough.

 Taeyeon’s punishments are more mental than physical, though having her sharp, manicured nails digging into the flesh of my backside is quite painful. I didn’t realize she could be so sadistic, but it shouldn’t have surprised me.

She ties my hands together, which keeps me from touching myself. She won’t touch me, either, so I’ve got to climax on just the feeling of her shoving either her short, slender fingers into me or a thick dildo. When I do come (and she won’t stop until I do, even if it’s becoming painful due to overstimulation), she throws insult after insult at me, shaming me for liking it. Afterward, I’ve got to clean myself up, as well as whatever else I soiled, while she gathers my things and throws them down on the floor in a pile. I get dressed and leave and she won’t talk to me because she’s still angry.

At this point, the only reason I’m still putting up with it is that she would tell everyone about what happened between Chanyeol and me. And I'm not ready for that, and I don't think Chanyeol is, either.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for reading!
> 
> my Twitter: @certkpopjunkie  
> my AFF: fallingforyou2ne1  
> my Wattpad: fallingforyou2ne1 (@lazygirl1320)


	13. "I really want to kiss you."

We won our last game of the season on Friday, the game that qualifies us for championships. The entire team was talking happily in the locker room, excited that we were going to get to go to the championships down at the beach again this year. I didn’t talk to anyone, letting myself be consumed in my thoughts because it’s not that exciting to me. That trip used to be fun, but it was just going to be completely miserable this year.

Lately, staying with Taeyeon and trying to get her to forgive me just seems pointless, mostly because she’ll never forgive me. There’s no future for us past this year of high school, so why am I wasting my time? I would end it, but I don’t know if I’m ready for that battle. I know what breaking up with her would entail, but I’m not trying to protect myself from that fate anymore. The only person I’m doing this for is Chanyeol because he’s obviously not comfortable with it and he may never be. It’s possible I was wrong to assume that maybe he had feelings for me. I’ve seen him around, always with Seohyun, and they’ve been off and on since before Chanyeol and I started using each other.

I’ve come to believe he really was just using me, but I’m not sure why because everyone knows Seohyun puts out and that’s all Chanyeol’s ever been interested in. Ever since the beginning of high school, he’s chased girls with nothing in mind but a one night stand. I can’t remember him ever having a steady girlfriend until he started seeing Seohyun in eleventh grade. Of course, they weren’t officially together for multiple reasons, one being that Taeyeon forbade all the other girls on the cheer-squad from dating him, even before what’s recently happened between us, and no one knows why. The other reason was that he wasn’t the type to settle with someone. The summer after the eleventh grade was when he and I started fooling around. After that, he stopped seeing her. I guess once I was gone, he just replaced me with her because it was that easy.

I couldn’t say it didn’t hurt, but I also couldn’t say I was surprised.

Now that we were going to the championships, football practice was going to be more often and much more grueling. I’ll be seeing Chanyeol much more and I’m not sure how things will be between us. I’ve done a lot to stop myself from thinking about him, especially in a romantic way, so I’m afraid that this will just set me back.

 

“Have you been talking to Chanyeol?” Taeyeon asked me, staring into my eyes and taking a bite of her rice. It felt like a trick question, but I knew the right answer.

“No. Why?” I couldn’t stop myself from asking. I haven’t spoken to him in so long and hearing anything about him would be satisfying, even if I heard it from Taeyeon.

“I was just wondering,” she said, obviously angry and disappointed I’d jumped at the chance to learn something about what he’d been up to.

Before the end of that period of lunch, Taeyeon and most of the other girls got up, leaving me and the rest of the guys as well as Seohyun and Sooyoung. I was about to say something, anything, to D.O when Seohyun started whispering to Sooyoung and I was immediately curious, seeing as she was involved with Chanyeol.

“At least I don’t have to hide anymore,” she said, her face looking sad. “I would’ve continued, but he said he wasn’t feeling it anymore, that he’s in love with someone else.” Was I hearing this correctly? What other girl had he charmed behind her back?

Sooyoung’s eyes widened. “He actually told you he’s in love with someone else? How heartless.”

“I appreciate that he’s honest enough to end things before I fall for him even harder, though. I just wish I knew who...” she replied, picking at her tray that was still pretty full.

“Probably some whore who spreads her legs wider,” Sooyoung said, reaching across the table and placing her hand on Seohyun’s forearm. “Whoever it is, they aren’t as great as you are and he’ll figure that out.”

 

The locker beside mine opened and my cheeks instantly started heating up. His proximity to me was torture and I wanted to reach out and touch him so badly. I chanced a look at him, trying to be discreet, but as soon as I looked, my eyes met his. I couldn’t tear my gaze away before he gave me a sweet, kind of sad smile that made my heart speed up. He looked away first, turning to dig around in his locker before closing it.

He stopped right behind me, reaching around and shoving something into the pocket of my hoodie. He took his hand away slowly, letting the palm caress my side, and then he was gone.

I waited until I’d lost him in the crowd before I took whatever it was out and found a neatly folded piece of paper. We used to pass notes in elementary and middle school like this, folding the papers up intricately so that they looked like tiny envelopes. To make sure it didn’t open, he’d attached a small sticker, a cute cartoon puppy, and it was just like Chanyeol to do something like that. It made my heart clench with longing, wanting to have him next to me.

I opened the paper carefully, not wanting to tear it even a little bit.

Hello, angel, you’re like a painting  
You’re all I see when I look to the skies  
City street lights, even if the lights go out  
And the moon disappears, it’s bright because  
I have a star that fell from the skies  
And it’s you

I keep laughing for some reason every night  
Even when I close my eyes, I can’t sleep  
I spend the entire night with thoughts of you  
Your sparkling smile lets me breathe  
You are probably hiding your wings behind your back  
Anyone can tell you’re an angel  
I can fly as long as I’m with you

 

Baek, I’d really like to talk to you. I understand if you don’t want to talk to me, but I’ve got some things to say and I’d really like it if you’d hear me out.

 

\-- Chanyeol

Does this mean he’s ready? That he’s okay with people knowing? I hated to break so easily, but this is everything I’ve wanted for years and I wasn’t going to pass up the opportunity to get answers... even if Taeyeon would kill me if she found out.

 

I made my way up the steps to Chanyeol’s house, thinking the best place would be somewhere private. We’ve come close to getting caught (not to mention succeeding in actually getting caught) too many times at school. His car was parked in the driveway, so I knew he was there. I was just hoping Seohyun wasn’t around asking for answers as to why he wanted to stop seeing her.

Before I could knock or ring the doorbell, the door opened and he was standing there in the doorway, his eyes wide like he hadn’t been expecting me to take him up on this.

“Can I come in?” I asked, not being able to stop my hand from coming up and scratching the back of my head.

“Yeah, yeah, sure.” he stuttered, obviously nervous, before stepping aside and gesturing for me to walk in past him. I didn’t get very far before he was grabbing my arm and dragging me up the stairs.

“Chanyeol—”

“Shh... My parents are home and I don’t want to have to waste time with them,” he said, pulling me into his room and closing the door. 

Since the last time I’d been in there, his room hadn’t changed at all. There were still posters of different singers on the walls, papers were strewn all over his desk, and his bed wasn’t made. It smelled nice, though, which was a nice change from the usual smell of pizza and... sex.

“I didn’t know you’d come here, so I didn’t really clean—”

“It’s fine, Chanyeol.” I blushed, trying to get comfortable on his desk chair because there was no way I was sitting on his bed.

“Did you like it? The lyrics?” he asked, looking like a little kid that desperately wanted approval from their parents.

“Yeah, but when I looked them up, I couldn’t find the song. It’s some kind of obscure stuff, isn’t it?” I honestly had looked the lyrics up online, but there were no results. I know that he likes a lot of different music and some of it isn’t popular in the slightest, sometimes not even having actual audiences. But I found it strange that there was nothing at all on the Internet.

He laughed nervously, sitting down on his bed and fiddling with a loose seam on the comforter. “Well, no, you wouldn’t have found it online... I wrote them.”

“Huh?”

“I wrote them about you, for you,” he answered, gaining a little more confidence. “There’s more, but I didn’t want to write them all down.” His knee started bouncing up and down, another nervous tick. He was wearing a hat that hid his ears, so I couldn’t gather information off of that.

“You wrote a song about me?” I asked, remembering the words he’d written, how neatly he’d written them.

“It wasn’t hard. I can’t stop thinking about you, so I decided I’d make use of my thoughts.” He laughed, still nervous, but he’d seen that I’d liked them so he wasn’t as nervous.

“Can I see the rest?” I asked quietly, peering at the crumpled up pieces of paper around my feet. I recognized some of the words, the same lyrics as the ones he’d given me, but there were different variations that he’d obviously scrapped.

“Uh, yeah, of course.” He seemed surprised, but he obliged and took out a notebook, flipping to a page marked with a sticky note sticking out at the top.

Hello, angel, you’re like a painting  
You’re all I see when I look to the skies  
City street lights, even if the lights go out  
And the moon disappears, it’s bright because  
I have a star that fell from the skies  
And it’s you

I keep laughing for some reason every night  
Even when I close my eyes, I can’t sleep  
I spend the entire night with thoughts of you  
Your sparkling smile lets me breathe  
You are probably hiding your wings behind your back  
Anyone can tell you’re an angel  
I can fly as long as I’m with you

The sky gave you everything  
And the world gave you to me  
I will keep you by my side so you can’t fly back to the sky  
I will capture you, I will cage you, I will hold you

Hello, angel, you’re like a painting  
You’re all I see when I look to the skies  
City street lights, even if the lights go out  
And the moon disappears, it’s bright because  
I have a star that fell from the skies  
And it’s you... and it’s you

You say easily, so easily  
To not jokingly call you so pretty  
Hold me even more warmly, like a blanket  
Stay by my side, unchanging just like the beginning  
I’ll always be with you, I would always imagine  
I’d do anything if it meant this could be forever  
If this is a dream, I hope I never wake up  
And I just wanna know your everyday

The sky gave you everything  
And the world gave you to me  
I will protect you so your heart isn’t broken or cracked  
I promise that I will live for you

Hello, angel, you’re like a painting  
You’re all I see when I look to the skies  
City street lights, even if the lights go out  
And the moon disappears, it’s bright because  
I have a star that fell from the skies  
And it’s you

Even the brightest jewel in heaven  
Couldn’t be as dazzling as you  
Don’t drift away from me, baby  
Won’t you stay? I’ll love only you forever

Hello, angel, you’re like a painting  
You’re all I see when I look to the skies  
City street lights, even if the lights go out  
And the moon disappears, it’s bright because  
I have a star that fell from the skies  
And it’s you... and it’s you

 

As I read the words, my heart beat faster. I could feel a lump forming in my throat. My legs were weak and my thoughts were running across my mind so fast I felt a little dizzy. I knew what I wanted to say, but I also knew what I had to say.

“Chanyeol...” It killed me to keep my composure, to hand it back to him like the lyrics meant nothing to me, but I had to. “Just because you wrote a song about me doesn’t mean that I’m going to just fall back into bed with you so you can throw me out when you want. You don’t care about me. You don’t love me.” Every word ripped me apart even more and I could see him flinch every time I spoke. “That,” I pointed at his notebook. “means nothing. I have more respect for myself than to let sweet lies sway me.”

“But, Baek, that’s not what—”

“I have to go, Chanyeol. Taeyeon and I are supposed to have dinner tonight,” A lie. “and I’ve got to pick her up. I only came here to tell you that I’m over it.” My heart was racing, the lump in my throat threatening to become too much, but I had to finish this. “I don’t love you. I came here to tell you to fuck off.”

His eyes were already welling with tears so I left quickly, not looking back at him.

 

“What’s on your mind, Baekhyunnie?” Taeyeon asked, feigning emotion, pretending to care.

“I’m just trying to figure out what to get,” I replied, hoping she’d believe it.

But, of course, she didn’t. “I’d suggest the samgyeopsal. I’d also suggest you not lie to me.”

I nodded, placing the menu on the end of the table because my meal had been decided. “I’m not lying.”

She sighed. “Baekhyun, I found this on the floor of your car.” She held the note Chanyeol had given me earlier, which I remembered folding back up into an envelope, but it was open and crumpled now. “So let me ask you again, what’s on your mind, Baekhyunnie?”

I snatched it out of her hand before she could jerk it away, smoothing it out on the table so I could fold it up again. The lump in my throat was back and I didn’t think I was going to be able to overpower it this time. “Fine. I went to meet him. I told him it doesn’t matter. I told him to fuck off. I told him I don’t love him. Happy, Tae?”

She looked taken aback by my bitterness, but she composed herself quickly and almost said something back to me, but I cut her off.

“You know what? I’m so tired of this. I don’t want to do this anymore.” I said, blurting it out before I could change my mind about saying it.

“You don’t want to do what anymore?” she asked, looking angry.

“I don’t want to date you anymore. I don’t care if you tell everyone I’m gay because I am. I don’t care if they’ll all shun me because of it because living like this has got to be more painful. I thought that maybe I was wrong and that I could fall for you and I almost did, I think, but then you found out about Chanyeol and me and you were angry. You’ve been angry for almost two months, Taeyeon, and it’s so hard to try to like, much less love, someone who seems to hate you for everything you are. It’s pointless, I guess, trying to get you to forgive me. I just hope I can get Chanyeol to.”

I tried to stand up, but she caught my wrist, pulling me back down. “Wait, Baekhyun. Please, just stay and finish dinner.”

“Why?”

“Because people are watching.”

Despite supposedly ‘not caring’ what people thought, I gave her this last thing and stayed.

 

Immediately after we finished eating, I drove Taeyeon home. When we arrived at her house, I walked her to the door even though her house was empty. She was almost through the door and I was about to turn around to head home and wallow in loneliness when she leaned down and kissed my cheek. “You made it longer than I thought you would.”

“What do you mean?”

“At first, I’ll admit, I only wanted you to be my boyfriend because you’re cute. When I got to know you, though, and when you started being so nice to me, I started to really care about you. I think I could’ve loved you, if you weren’t... you know... gay.” She laughed a little, bringing one of her hands up to caress my cheek. “The point is, since I found out about you and Chanyeol, I didn’t want to keep you from each other. But I couldn’t bring myself to break up with you. I’ve been treating you so badly because I’ve been hoping you’d grow a pair and break up with me first.”

“What?”

“I’m sorry, okay?” She looked at me fondly, like Kim Taeyeon actually had a heart. “Just do one thing for me?”

“Why would I?”

“One last thing.”

After a bit of hesitation, I nodded. “What?”

“Go find Chanyeol and tell him you love him.”

 

To go out with Taeyeon earlier, I’d skipped Chen’s party. I was guessing, hoping, that Chanyeol was there. I was hoping for a lot of things, one of them being that he’d forgive me for being such a major dickwad.

“Baekhyun?” A deep voice, but not the one I wanted to hear.

“Kai, have you seen Chanyeol?” I asked, not making small talk.

“Uh, he’s been around. Last I saw him, he was sitting on a couch somewhere looking really... well, you know.”

“I know what?”

“I’m guessing he’s acting depressed ‘cause of you.” My eyes widened and I struggled to say something, but he held up a hand. “Doesn’t matter. It was the living room... or maybe the lounge... I’m not sure.”

Upon hearing this, I pushed through the crowded area to the living room. I saw familiar faces, but none of them were his.

“Are you looking for Chanyeol?” Sehun came up and asked me.

“How did you know?”

“Oh, we all pretty much know that you two have been weird lately and he’s down about something and I’m guessing it’s you. What happened between you two?”

“Where is he?” I asked, ignoring his question without much grace.

“I saw him in the kitchen,” he replied, looking dead serious.

“But Kai said—”

“Baekhyun! What are you doing here?” Chen asked, hooking an arm around my shoulders. “Chanyeol said you were going out with Taeyeon. I’m glad you could make it, though, because I’m trying to set him up with someone to hopefully cheer him up.”

I couldn’t stop my face from scrunching up with disgust. “Where is he?”

“I left him in one of the bedrooms.”

“Which one?”

“Not sure...”

I bolted up the stairs and ran down the hallway, checking every room. D.O and Yoona were in one of them and he was pissed I’d opened the door and gotten a peek at his girlfriend’s boobs.

“Baekhyun, what the fuck are you doing? You can’t just barge into a room if the door’s closed!”

“I’m sorry, but I’m looking for Chanyeol and Chen said he’d left him in one of these rooms,” I said, trying not to look at Yoona, who hadn’t even moved to cover herself up.

“Get out!” D.O yelled, pushing my chest and slamming the door in my face.

“Whoa, did you just interrupt D.O and Yoona?” Lay asked, his arm linked around Jessica’s waist. They were a nice sight to see because I knew Lay hated drinking.

“Oh, thank God, Lay, do you know where Chanyeol is?” I asked, pressing my palms together in a sort of prayer.

He looked away from me to Jessica and she shook her head, which was confusing, to say the least. “Uh... Baek, Chanyeol said that if you came looking for him that I couldn’t tell you where he is.”

“What?”

“Sorry to butt in, but you really hurt him, Baekhyun,” Jessica said, sinking further into Lay’s side. “It’s hard enough to come out, but when the person you thought would never hurt you does exactly that, while you’re coming out even, it really hurts.”

“But he didn’t—”

“He said you wouldn’t even let him talk,” Lay said, looking protective over Chanyeol all of a sudden. “You looked at the song he’s spent countless hours on and threw it back at him before he could even say anything.”

I shook my head rapidly. “Please, Lay, I’m trying to make this right,” I begged, dropping to my knees. “I broke up with Taeyeon, I came here to find him. I need to tell him I’m sorry and that I lied.”

Lay looked at Jessica again and she just looked away, crossing her arms over her chest. “He’s... he’s...” I nodded, urging him to continue. “He’s in the lounge.”

Kai said he might be in the lounge, but I’d checked the living room first and gotten swept up by the other guys. I pushed past Lay and Jessica, hearing her fussing at him as I left. I ran down the stairs, passing Suho and Yuri as well as Xiumin and... Victoria? He’d landed Victoria Song? I guess he was smoother than anyone thought.

The door to the lounge was locked from the inside. I knocked on the door, trying to sound calm. Obviously, he didn’t want to see me and I didn’t blame him, so I had to make him think I was someone else so he’d let me inside. It must have worked because the door crept open a bit and I moved out of sight quickly so he’d open it wider.

“Hello? God, tell me I’m not hearing things now, too.” He peeked out and saw me, but not before I could wedge my foot in the doorway to keep him from closing it. He didn’t see that, so he tried to close it with a bit of force and it hurt, so I screamed. “Baekhyun, what are you doing!?”

“I’m trying to talk to you!”

“You already said everything you needed to. I’ll leave you alone,” he said, but he didn’t move to close the door.

I plopped down on the floor outside of the lounge, cradling my foot in my hands. Maybe he’d be more sympathetic and apt to hear me out if he thought he’d hurt me.

“I’m sorry, I didn’t see it.” he apologized, sinking down to the floor with me. “I’m sorry.”

“It’s okay,” I mumbled, trying to move it but stopping quickly when I felt a pain shoot through it.

He groaned, sliding a hand under my thighs and bringing one to the small of my back. He lifted me up, cradling me close to his chest, and carried me to one of the couches. Once he’d put me down, he moved to leave.

“Chanyeol, no. Wait.”

“What, Baekhyun?” The look in his eyes was pained, which told me he still cared.

“I made a mistake.” I stated, sitting up and bit and dragging him back down beside me. “I shouldn’t have said those things. None of it was true. I thought I was protecting myself.” He didn’t respond, just looking down at the floor, instead, so I continued. “I thought you didn’t actually have feelings for me before and when I saw that you do... or did... I got scared. The song is so beautiful, by the way. I never got the chance to tell you that. I love it.” I took a deep breath. “And I love you. I have since ninth grade. I’m sorry, Chanyeol.”

He sighed, leaning into me and resting his head on my shoulder. My heart fluttered. “I hate to say it, but I forgive you,” he mumbled. “I’ve never been able to stay mad at you.” He laughed.

We were both quiet, enjoying the warmth of the other person for a few minutes. The party continued outside of the lounge, pouring into the room through the slightly open door.

“So what now?” I asked, looking down at my hands and twiddling my thumbs.

He laughed and sat back up, putting his arm around my shoulders and pulling me into him. “Now,” He took my shoulders into his hands and held me at arms’ length. “I really want to kiss you.”

I blushed and tried to look away, but he caught my chin and made me look at him. His ears were a bit pink at the tips, which meant he was nervous, so I didn’t feel as anxious knowing he felt the same way. I looked into his eyes, at his perfect face, his semi-curly hair, and his pretty lips, and all I wanted was for him to lean in first and kiss me.

Which was exactly what he did.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for reading!
> 
> my Twitter: @certkpopjunkie  
> my AFF: fallingforyou2ne1  
> my Wattpad: fallingforyou2ne1 (@lazygirl1320)


	14. "Will you be my boyfriend?"

“Can I just kiss every single inch of you?” Chanyeol asked, breaking away from my lips for the first time in about ten minutes.

I laughed. “You can try.”

He started peppering kisses down my jawline, my neck, stopping to suck and nip at some skin on my collarbone like he was actually going to kiss every inch of me. The feeling of his lips on mine, my skin, has been something I’ve been dreaming of for years. Now that I finally had it, I realized it was so much better than I could’ve imagined.

“Hey, Chanyeol, Baekhyun was looking—” Chen came into the lounge with Tiffany on his arm and immediately came to a screeching halt when he saw us on the couch. Tiffany’s face looked like she had just seen a ghost. “I guess he found you.”

“What the hell?” Tiffany screamed, looking from Chen and back to us. “What... What are you two doing?”

The tips of Chanyeol’s ears were pink again and I was blushing beet red, but neither of us moved to make space between us. He really did want to be with me, even if people knew.

“Uh... making out?” Chanyeol replied, smirking. “What does it look like we’re doing?”

“But you two are... Baekhyun, what about Taeyeon?” Tiffany stuttered, untangling herself from Chen and coming to stand in front of us.

“We broke up.” I looked back at Chen and he was just leaning against the doorframe, watching Tiffany get flustered.

“Does she know that you’re—”

“Gay? That I’m gay? Yes, she does.” I felt Chanyeol’s hand against my own, which made me feel so much more confident in facing Tiffany. “She’s okay.”

She sighed. “I never would’ve guessed Chanyeol would be into guys...” He slipped his hand into mine, squeezing slightly, before gently resting his head on my shoulder.

“Come on, Tiffany, let’s go.” Chen came up and took her hand, pulling her toward the door. She didn’t fight back or say anything, just letting him guide her away.

Once they were gone, I looked at Chanyeol. “Well...?”

He furrowed his brow. “’Well’ what? I’m still here, aren’t I?”

“Yeah, you are.” I smiled, not able to stop myself. “And we’re okay?”

“Of course.” He smiled back, pulling me into him, one hand on the back of my head, running through my hair, the other still holding my hand.

 

Two days later we were back at school and it almost felt like nothing had changed, though everything had. I was back at my old regular table with my friends, laughing and talking about things that happened over the weekend and in our classes.

D.O had worked up the nerve to tell Yoona that he still wanted to be with her, but he wasn’t going to sacrifice his friends for their relationship, and she respected that. They were still together, sitting at their respective tables with their own friends. The rest of the guys had pretty much done the same, following D.O’s lead, and managed to keep their girlfriends as well.

Kai came and sat with us sometimes, but he also sat with his girlfriend and her friends. We’d all been surprised he’d finally settled on one girl, and it was even more surprising that the girl he’d settled for was Krystal Jung, who was quiet and kept to herself, pretty much the opposite of Kai.

Xiumin had found love in Victoria Song, each putting aside their competitiveness over the spot for valedictorian and seeing they had a lot more in common than just a love for academia.

As for me, having my friends know about what had happened between Chanyeol and me was surprisingly freeing. I used to think it would weigh down on me and they would push me away, but they didn’t. Suho fussed at me for not believing in them more, but all of us were otherwise okay. So far, only my friends and Tiffany and Taeyeon knew about it because it was nice to take things slow, but I was sure the news would get out eventually. I was okay with that, and so was Chanyeol, and that was all we needed.

 

Once the weather started to get warmer, we started sitting outside in the courtyard. I was waiting for Chanyeol one day, talking to D.O, when he interrupted me, “So you don’t care if people know?”

I was surprised by the suddenness of the question, but I knew what he was talking about. “No, I don’t. Why?”

He nodded behind me and I turned around to find Chanyeol standing there. “Hey.” I smiled, patting the spot on the bench next to me.

Chanyeol returned my smile and shook his head. “I need to ask you something first.”

I was immediately confused, but I nodded. “What is it?”

His ears were turning pink and his cheeks were slightly flushed, so I was a little nervous about what was coming next. I’m not sure how I didn’t see it coming, but the surprise was nice. This way, I hadn’t had all day to get worked up about it.

He took my hands and pulled me up so I was standing in front of him before he took something out of his pocket. “Baek, the last time I gave you a ring it was so that you could give it to someone else,” he said, looking down at his hands as he opened them, revealing his football ring. My eyes widened, and I looked around quickly, seeing that everyone outside was looking at the two of us. He brought one hand up and touched my cheek, turning my head so I had to look up at him. “This time, I’m giving you my ring because I want you to keep it on your finger all the time so that everybody knows you’re mine.”

My heart was beating so fast I thought it would burst out of my chest and my legs felt weak at the knees.

He took my hand in his hand and asked, “Baekhyun, will you wear it? Will you be my boyfriend?” I heard gasps and whispers all around us, as well as I few people that sounded pleased, which were probably our friends.

I used to think this whole ring thing that football players did when they asked someone out was so stupid. I still kind of thought it was stupid, honestly. But this wasn’t just about upholding tradition; it was about not hiding anymore, about letting everyone know that we’re a couple. Asking me out in front of people meant Chanyeol didn’t care if people criticized us, and if he did, he wasn’t letting it control him.

I smiled again, feeling the heat in my face, and nodded again and again. “Yes, I will.”

He slid the ring on my finger and wrapped his arm around my waist, bending down to kiss me right there in front of the entire courtyard.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for reading!
> 
> my Twitter: @certkpopjunkie  
> my AFF: fallingforyou2ne1  
> my Wattpad: fallingforyou2ne1 (@lazygirl1320)


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